Somewhere, there's a ballistics study where they used live goats as the surrogate BG. If you want to go for the quickest kill, a .357MAG killed faster, at least in that study, not trying to start a pet caliber flame war or anything, than the .45ACP. So, if someone were to pull that "You're just bloodthirsty, on account of your big gun." B.S. in a court, I'd have no choice but to trot that little factoid out.
Right after that, I'd respond with "Every time I've pulled by personal protection sidearm, it has been with a single goal in mind, to end the danger, to stop the threat. If that threat stops after I've pulled my sidearm, but before I've fired a single shot by my assailant throwing down his weapon and running away, then my sidearm will have done its job. If the threat only ends after I've been forced to empty an entire magazine into my assailant because he hasn't been knocked to the ground and lost his weapon yet, then so be it. I never shoot to kill. I shoot to stop. Every time, bar none."
It's not shoot to kill or shoot to live. Those things are just for court room theatrics. Everywhere and all the time, it's shoot to stop.
When they "Nudge. Shove. Shoot.",
Don't retreat. Just reload.