You probably need to take her to a place and rent some before you buy and let HER tell you what feels are works best.
There are a ton of choices, but the only one with a safety that I can recall is the M&P. Personally, I don't think a manual safety is all that smart. Unless she is going to practice a ton flipping that safety off and pulling the trigger. Honestly, I believe point and shoot is the best. Your brain and fingers are the best safety. The less a person has to think about under stress the better.
You will here Glock, M&P, Ruger and Springfield. Perhaps the Ruger has a manual safety. I have not shot that particular pistol and am unsure.
Still - RENT and let HER choose what works for her.