Zombie attack preparedness part deux

[festus]

A while back in the survival forum we had a zombie attack thread that was an absolute blast!

So let's lighten up a bit and have some fun with that again.

Everybody knows after a nuclear/biological/chemical disaster...ZOMBIES!

ZOMBIE ZOMBIE Whatcha Gonna Do When They Come For You?

I plan on finding a high inaccessible place such as a roof top/water tower and hauling as much ammo, food and supplies as I can safely get up there. This will make a great safe haven.

[JJFlash]

Anyone truly preparing for a SHTF scenario has to have a "zombie attack" plan; only a fool would ignore this dire threat.

Now, it is a known fact that the vast majority of zombies were Democraps and socialists in their prior life. The proof of this is their dead-eyed, slack-jawed drooling and their mindless countenance (and that was before they became zombies). So, while they are looking to invade your home and tear you to shreds, they can be distracted, at least momentarily, by recordings of "The One".

So, we have installed a number of speakers throughout the property, which sporadically emit "freebie" messages: e.g., "free college education", "free homes", "free medical care", "free retirement", etc. As the zombies advance across the yard, they lurch toward each of these recordings as the recordings commence. Their voices, in unison, drone: "The One, The One, The One".

This gives us the time we need to light 'em up with the zombie arsenal. For the ones at the farthest reaches of the property, the new AR-15, and a couple .270 short mag deer rifles. As they advance,the sequence becomes: .30-.30s, .357, .45, 9mm, .38 spcl. Finally, for close-in work, grab the shotguns.

It's like a party, actually, as long as you are prepared.

[HK4U]

I am going to put on a Obummer mask and dress my dog up as the first lady so they think I am their leader. Only problem with that plan is I may have to get an uglier dog.

[JJFlash]

I am going to put on a Obummer mask and dress my dog up as the first lady so they think I am their leader. Only problem with that plan is I may have to get an uglier dog.

Just make the one ya got walk backwards, HK, that'll do it. (We're nasty, brother...)

[ricbak]

Reports in the journals about this attack may have somethang to do with the following report:

Heaviest Element Yet Known to Science Discovered
March 14, 2010 - 14:09 ET
Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory in California has now identified with certainty the heaviest element known to science.
The new element, Pelosium (PL), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.
These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.
Pelosium is inert, and has no charge and no magnetism. Nevertheless, it can be detected because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A tiny amount of Pelosium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete.
Pelosium has a normal half-life of 2 years. It does not decay, but instead undergoes a biennial reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.
Pelosium mass will increase over time, since each reorganization will promote many morons to become isodopes.
This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Pelosium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.
When catalyzed with money, Pelosium becomes Senatorium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Pelosium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.

[Ga9mm]

I was thinking about this yesterday. My wife and I were watching Zombieland!! I paused it right in the middle to make some popcorn and make sure my shotgun was loaded to capacity. I've got some old fire extinguishers that hold water and you have to pump air into them to force the water out. I was thinking about filling one with bleach to see what it would do...

[6shootercarry]

Reports in the journals about this attack may have somethang to do with the following report:

YEA!!! You nailed it...

I bet one of the side effects of long term exposure to that element is zombieosis...

[JJFlash]

[QUOTE=Ga9mm;121274]I was thinking about this yesterday. My wife and I were watching Zombieland!! I paused it right in the middle to make some popcorn and make sure my shotgun was loaded to capacity. /QUOTE]

Was it like late at nite? And did you get a little nervous? Fess up, Ga9...I mean, c'mon...make a little popcorn, and "make sure my shotgun was loaded"?

It's ok, dude, we've all been there. Those zombies can be scary!

[6shootercarry]

[quote=JJFlash;121279]

I was thinking about this yesterday. My wife and I were watching Zombieland!! I paused it right in the middle to make some popcorn and make sure my shotgun was loaded to capacity. /QUOTE]

Was it like late at nite? And did you get a little nervous? Fess up, Ga9...I mean, c'mon...make a little popcorn, and "make sure my shotgun was loaded"?

It's ok, dude, we've all been there. Those zombies can be scary!

I watch COPS or America's Most Wanted and I have the .45 or .357 loaded and ready!!! I get scared too

Peace...

[JJFlash]

[quote=6shootercarry;121281]

I watch COPS or America's Most Wanted and I have the .45 or .357 loaded and ready!!! I get scared too

Peace...

COPS just gets me laughing or shaking my head at the stoooopid people out there.

Now, having said that, give me a good movie about some psychopathic killer stalking folks in their homes...and...I've been known to double check the locked doors and make sure there was a piece close by.

And you won't EVER find me watching slasher flicks..uh, uh...not in a million years.

(Shhhh...we're all tough guy warriors...we can't let on we're scared of anything, especially zombies!)