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Crap... I thought I was a Southerner... but I guess Im only a "R"
Are You a D, R or S? Just received this email. Easy decision!
Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?
Here is a little test that will help you decide.
The answer can be found by posing the following question:
You're walking down a
Deserted street with your wife
And two small children.
Suddenly, a Terrorist with a huge knife
Comes around the corner,
Locks eyes with you,
Screams obscenities,
Raises the knife, and charges at you...
You are carrying a
Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP, and you are an expert shot.
You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.
What do you do?
THINK CAREFULLY AND
THEN SCROLL DOWN:
Democrat's Answer:
Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
What is a Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP?
Does the man look poor or oppressed?
Is he really a terrorist? Am I guilty of profiling?
Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife think?
What about the kids?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?
What does the law say about this situation?
Does the pistol have appropriate safety built into it?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?
Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?
Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?
Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted?
We need to raise taxes, have paint & weed day.
Can we make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.
I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus.
This is all so confusing!
............ ......... ......... ......... ......... ......... ........ ......... .
Republican's Answer:
BANG!
............ ......... ......... ......... ......... ......... ........ ......
Southerner's Answer:
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG ! BANG! BANG! BANG!
Click..... (Sounds of reloading)
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG!
BANG!
BANG!
Click
Daughter: 'Nice grouping, Daddy!'
'Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?!
Son: 'Can I shoot the next one?!'
Wife: 'You ain't taking that to the Taxidermist!
| |  |
Crap... I thought I was a Southerner... but I guess Im only a "R"
Apparently, the wife of a southerner.
Our prime purpose in this life is to help others. And if you can't help them, at least don't hurt them.--The Dalai Lama
OMG LOL....
I'm so very much a southerner.
Can't stop laughing...
S&W M&P 45; Ruger GP100 .357 Magnum; Charter Arms .38 Undercover
Phillip, you are NOT displaying that thing in the living room.Originally Posted by Phillip Gain
OMG LOL....
I'm so very much a southerner.
Can't stop laughing...
Our prime purpose in this life is to help others. And if you can't help them, at least don't hurt them.--The Dalai Lama
I thought I was just a dumb old farmer from California, but I guess I have some Southerner in me. My wife might have beat me to the draw though
Master of Poverty Knob
Southerner. When asked why I only shot the guy six times I said "When I pulled the trigger the seventh time it only went CLICK."
I don't carry a gun to kill someone. I carry a gun to avoid being a victim! Gary
Southern Yankee. When we run out of ammo, we kick em!
After shooting him up like that theirs not going to be much left to take to the taxidermist.
Try what we call down South "Redneck CPR" instead. That's when you stomp on his chest hollering, "Git up or you'll die."
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