Shopping at Costco

**-06** · 01-20-2012, 02:18 AM

MY LAST TRIP TO COSTCO
Yesterday, I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Charlie, the Wonder Dog, and was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
What did she think, I had an elephant? So, since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I
told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again.
I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward.
I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and that the way that it works is, to load your pants pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The
food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food poisoned me.
I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle's behind and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.
Costco won't let me shop there anymore.

Better watch what you ask retired people.
They have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say!