I don't get it.
A Baptist preacher and his wife decided to get a new dog. Ever mindful of the congregation, they knew the dog must also be a Baptist. They visited kennel after kennel and explained their needs. Finally, they found a kennel whose owner assured them he had just the dog they wanted.
The owner brought the dog to meet the pastor and his wife. 'Fetch the Bible,' he commanded. The dog bounded to the bookshelf, scrutinized the books, located the Bible, and brought it to the owner. 'Now find Psalm 23' he commanded. The dog dropped the Bible to the floor and showing the marvelous dexterity with his paws, leafed through and found the correct passage, then pointed to it with his paw. The pastor and his wife were very impressed and purchased the dog. That evening, a group of church members came to visit.
The pastor and his wife began to show off the dog, having him locate several Bible verses. The visitors were very impressed. Finally, one man asked, 'Can he do regular dog tricks, too?' 'I haven't tried yet,' the past or replied. He pointed his finger at the dog. 'HEEL!' the pastor commanded. The dog immediately jumped on a chair, placed one paw on the pastor's forehead and began to howl. The pastor looked at his wife in shock and said, 'Good Lord! He's Pentecostal.'
I don't get it.
It's a play on heal and heel and the "laying on of hands" pentecostals are so fond of. Then, you're supposed to laugh because you're probably not a believer in such actions; but a member of a more dignitfied religion. Y'see, there are hierarchies of prejudice...
is a good site for elucidation...
People don't like to be meddled with. We tell them what to do, what to think, don't run, don't walk. We're in their homes and in their heads and we haven't the right. We're meddlesome.--River Tam
Here's another religious joke.....
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS INVITE TWO BAPTISTS TO GO FISHING WITH YOU?
BECAUSE IF YOU INVITED JUST ONE, HE'D DRINK ALL YOUR BEER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!
Victory rewards not the army that fires the most rounds, but who is the more accurate shot. ---Unknown
Apparently I don't know as much about Baptism as I thought I did (I'm a Catholic, by the way) because I don't get this one either.
Two cannibals meet one day. The first cannibal says, "You know, I just can't seem to get a tender Missionary. I've baked them, I've roasted them, I've stewed them, I've barbecued them, I've tried every sort of marinade. I just cannot seem to get them tender."
The second cannibal asks, "What kind of Missionary do you use?" The other replied, "You know, the ones that hang out at that place at the bend of the river. They have those brown cloaks with a rope around the waist and they're sort of bald on top with a funny ring of hair on their heads."
"Ah, ha!" the second cannibal replies. "No wonder ... those are friars!"