Baptist Dog
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Baptist Dog

This is a discussion on Baptist Dog within the Off-Topic forums, part of the Main Category category; Baptist Dog A Baptist preacher and his wife decided to get a new dog. Ever mindful of the congregation, they ...

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    Talking Baptist Dog

    Baptist Dog

    A Baptist preacher and his wife decided to get a new dog. Ever mindful of the congregation, they knew the dog must also be a Baptist. They visited kennel after kennel and explained their needs. Finally, they found a kennel whose owner assured them he had just the dog they wanted.

    The owner brought the dog to meet the pastor and his wife. 'Fetch the Bible,' he commanded. The dog bounded to the bookshelf, scrutinized the books, located the Bible, and brought it to the owner. 'Now find Psalm 23' he commanded. The dog dropped the Bible to the floor and showing the marvelous dexterity with his paws, leafed through and found the correct passage, then pointed to it with his paw. The pastor and his wife were very impressed and purchased the dog. That evening, a group of church members came to visit.

    The pastor and his wife began to show off the dog, having him locate several Bible verses. The visitors were very impressed. Finally, one man asked, 'Can he do regular dog tricks, too?' 'I haven't tried yet,' the past or replied. He pointed his finger at the dog. 'HEEL!' the pastor commanded. The dog immediately jumped on a chair, placed one paw on the pastor's forehead and began to howl. The pastor looked at his wife in shock and said, 'Good Lord! He's Pentecostal.'

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    Quote Originally Posted by tattedupboy View Post
    I don't get it.

    It's a play on heal and heel and the "laying on of hands" pentecostals are so fond of. Then, you're supposed to laugh because you're probably not a believer in such actions; but a member of a more dignitfied religion. Y'see, there are hierarchies of prejudice...

    http://www.bettybowers.com/
    is a good site for elucidation...
    People don't like to be meddled with. We tell them what to do, what to think, don't run, don't walk. We're in their homes and in their heads and we haven't the right. We're meddlesome.--River Tam

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    Quote Originally Posted by NDS View Post
    It's a play on heal and heel and the "laying on of hands" pentecostals are so fond of. Then, you're supposed to laugh because you're probably not a believer in such actions; but a member of a more dignitfied religion. Y'see, there are hierarchies of prejudice...

    Betty Bowers -- America's Best Christian. Christian Advice and Republican Bush Politics, Political Shirts and Buttons from America's Most Saved Baptist
    is a good site for elucidation...
    The reason for this joke being funny is over my head, but I'm also wondering if your response (the part that is in bold) is sarcastic or for real. In case it is for real, I have never considered my religion better than anyone else's. As far as I'm concerned, no one demomination of Christianity should ever call itself better than another due simply to minute differences in rituals or interpretations of scripture.

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    Here's another religious joke.....

    WHY DO YOU ALWAYS INVITE TWO BAPTISTS TO GO FISHING WITH YOU?
































    BECAUSE IF YOU INVITED JUST ONE, HE'D DRINK ALL YOUR BEER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



    HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!
    Victory rewards not the army that fires the most rounds, but who is the more accurate shot. ---Unknown

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    Apparently I don't know as much about Baptism as I thought I did (I'm a Catholic, by the way) because I don't get this one either.

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    Talking it's the play on words like this one...

    Two cannibals meet one day. The first cannibal says, "You know, I just can't seem to get a tender Missionary. I've baked them, I've roasted them, I've stewed them, I've barbecued them, I've tried every sort of marinade. I just cannot seem to get them tender."


    The second cannibal asks, "What kind of Missionary do you use?" The other replied, "You know, the ones that hang out at that place at the bend of the river. They have those brown cloaks with a rope around the waist and they're sort of bald on top with a funny ring of hair on their heads."

    "Ah, ha!" the second cannibal replies. "No wonder ... those are friars!"

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    Quote Originally Posted by tattedupboy View Post
    Apparently I don't know as much about Baptism as I thought I did (I'm a Catholic, by the way) because I don't get this one either.
    Religious jokes are not funny at all anyway. I agree with you. I dont get them most of the time and when they do make sense they are not funny.

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