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CHUCK NORRIS...is such a bad @$$...

Chuck Norris does his own taxes and the IRS WILL NOT audit them!!! Chuck Norris counted to infinity...twice! Chuck Norris ...

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Old 04-10-2009, 02:11 PM
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Talking CHUCK NORRIS...is such a bad @$$...

Chuck Norris does his own taxes and the IRS WILL NOT audit them!!!

Chuck Norris counted to infinity...twice!

Chuck Norris is the only guy who can beat Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light because the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris!
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Old 04-11-2009, 04:49 AM
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Oh crap...I knew someone was gonna start with the Chuck Norris jokes. Here we go.
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Old 04-11-2009, 04:55 AM
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When Chuck Norris does push-ups, he's not pushing himself up, he's actually pushing the Earth down.

Chuck Norris doesn't "style" his hair. It lies perfectly in place out of sheer terror.

Outer space exists because it's too afraid to be on the same planet as Chuck Norris.
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Old 04-11-2009, 01:26 PM
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Old 04-11-2009, 02:10 PM
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Default Power of the Universe in the palm of his hand

Chuck Norris can divide by zero
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Old 04-11-2009, 08:03 PM
 

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Chuck Norris uses pepper spray on is steaks.
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Old 04-12-2009, 01:20 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by srshadwi View Post
Chuck Norris can divide by zero
Doesn't any number divided by zero equal one? I seem to remember something like that from high school.
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Old 04-12-2009, 03:36 AM
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Exclamation Chuck Norris...

Chuck Norris...sleeps with his boots on. That way when his feet hit the floor in the morning...Satan cries out "OH CRAP...HE"S AWAKE!!!"
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Old 04-12-2009, 09:58 AM
 

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cooter View Post
Doesn't any number divided by zero equal one? I seem to remember something like that from high school.
Any number except zero divided by zero is either infinity or indeterminate according to what you are doing. zero divided by zero is defined as one. All that is dependent on you not being Chuck Norris.
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Old 04-12-2009, 07:19 PM
 

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Chuck Norris for President.
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