If you want to carry, seriously consider a level 2 or 3 retention holster. This will help the fear of "grabbing it out of my belt and ...".Toting with the kids is definitely not going to be her thing in the near future. If she ever accepts the idea, it'll be me carrying and only when I don't have certain (or any) kids with me. Like I noted, she says she has a very "vivid imagination" about what at least one of our kids could do. Grabbing it out of my belt and yelling "BANG BANG" while pulling the trigger is a very real possibility to her with him. The other is so angry sometimes, and has a rather large chip on his shoulder toward me for personality reasons (teenagers!), and his impulse control when he's in that state of mind is a legendary zero. Even I could imagine him "having enough" and pulling it away from me to threaten me or use it on me.
As someone else mentioned in the thread, maybe I just need to wait a bit longer until the (two) kids are more mature and hopefully don't have so many behavioral issues.