Need tips to convince wife afraid of handguns


Babarock

New member
Toting with the kids is definitely not going to be her thing in the near future. If she ever accepts the idea, it'll be me carrying and only when I don't have certain (or any) kids with me. Like I noted, she says she has a very "vivid imagination" about what at least one of our kids could do. Grabbing it out of my belt and yelling "BANG BANG" while pulling the trigger is a very real possibility to her with him. The other is so angry sometimes, and has a rather large chip on his shoulder toward me for personality reasons (teenagers!), and his impulse control when he's in that state of mind is a legendary zero. Even I could imagine him "having enough" and pulling it away from me to threaten me or use it on me.

As someone else mentioned in the thread, maybe I just need to wait a bit longer until the (two) kids are more mature and hopefully don't have so many behavioral issues.
If you want to carry, seriously consider a level 2 or 3 retention holster. This will help the fear of "grabbing it out of my belt and ...".
 

Nick Burkhardt

New member
p2b4f, what are your CC and home defense weapons? I would suggest only keeping one or two loaded in a quick access safe. Then have two more safes. One for all other firearms and the second for ammo and loaded magazines. I doubt you will leave both open at the same time.

I understand her concerns for a CC handgun "OMG I came home, really had to go to the bathroom and left my loaded pistol on the sink". I suggest a handgun that can quickly be made safe, such as one with a magazine disconnect. Come home, remove the magazine and stick it in your front pocket. No magazine, no bang even with one in the chamber. Either that or get a pistol with a key lock and keep the key on a charm bracelet or necklace.
 

p2b4f

New member
p2b4f, what are your CC and home defense weapons?
Mossberg 500 12 gauge is all at this point. It's locked in a longbox safe with mechanical pushbutton combo system. It took a fraudulent 2012 election to convince her on that one. After buying that, and when SCOTUS struck down IL draconian anti-carry laws, I began researching handguns. When she saw that she drew her line in the sand.

I'll keep in mind the suggestion of multiple safes, separating ammo for the next time this comes up. I like the idea of a small biometric quick draw safe as an earlier poster mentioned.

One thing I didn't understand (because I'm a newbie to handguns) was this:

No magazine, no bang even with one in the chamber.
I always thought "one in the chamber" meant that you had pulled back the slide to ready your first round and that pulling the trigger would fire that round. (Sorry, total noob question.)
 

p2b4f

New member
Thanks. I looked at L3 holsters but those are too bulky and obvious. An L2 with lots of friction and that still fits in my waistband would probably work. Any recommendation on which specific products are best?
 
E

ezkl2230

Guest
OK, I'm not a lady, but I am the father of two special needs sons. My oldest has autism, and like your own child, he has an incredible fascination with firearms. My approach is simple. Any firearm that I don't carry with me is in a safe, and the keys stay with me. I concealed carry; my sons know that I OWN firearms, but they have no idea at this time that I CARRY them. My wife has observed me long enough to be comfortable with the idea that I carry, and she is also fully convinced of my ability to keep my carry firearm away from my boys. When I'm not carrying during the day (Cabela's doesn't permit carry on the job even though it allows the public to carry in our stores), my firearm is secured in a safe in my vehicle; my boys aren't even aware that the safe is in my vehicle. When I am in bed, my firearm is in my bed stand where they cannot see it, but I can access it quickly.

Convincing your wife boils down to one major consideration: trust.
 

BC1

,
Two of our kids are special needs kids. Part of their issues are anger/impulse management and also "sneakiness" and not knowing the meaning of "no". One in particular is scarily resourceful at getting into stuff he's not supposed to. Even with lots of gun safety education, his insatiable curiosity and desire to play with anything awesome and destructive is a big problem around here. Her fear is that even with a safe, one mistake on my part of leaving it open (I'm absentminded sometimes) would lead to disaster.
She has a valid concern because a single mistake could result in a child harming themselves. But I believe that's true of all households with kids, not just special needs kids. We don't refuse to own a gun just for that reason. She must understand that when proper safety practices are in place the kids will be fine.
 

JimTh

Banned
You need to make sure that you fully understand her concerns. That many youngsters with that kind of age spread would make me nervous having guns around the house. If it has not been suggested get her involved in developing a safety first thought process. Let her pick out the safe, the place to put the safe, the place to keep the ammo, etc.etc.etc... Her fears are not irrational, they are very well thought out and that is why she needs to be the 90 percent partner in this. If that don't work just cry and grovel. That has always worked for me!
 

Nick Burkhardt

New member
Mossberg 500 12 gauge is all at this point. It's locked in a longbox safe with mechanical pushbutton combo system. It took a fraudulent 2012 election to convince her on that one. After buying that, and when SCOTUS struck down IL draconian anti-carry laws, I began researching handguns. When she saw that she drew her line in the sand.

I'll keep in mind the suggestion of multiple safes, separating ammo for the next time this comes up. I like the idea of a small biometric quick draw safe as an earlier poster mentioned.
This is one of the better quick access Amazon.com: LockSafe Biometric Pistol Safe: Sports & Outdoors Just remember to wipe your print off the glass after each use.

Too big for vehicle use, so we take a ShotLock Small Universal Solo Vault Safe if we need to lock them up while traveling.

p2b4f said:
One thing I didn't understand (because I'm a newbie to handguns) was this:

I always thought "one in the chamber" meant that you had pulled back the slide to ready your first round and that pulling the trigger would fire that round. (Sorry, total noob question.)
 

Rocketgeezer

New member
Normaly I would support you on wanting a handgun for self defence, BUT in this instince with your special needs chjld you spoke of I understand her concern, the gunsafe is fine and I know all the hype about a 12 gauge for home defence, and I have two, but our bedroom has 4 handguns in it also, but we have no small kids, about the only thing I can see you getting away with is a handgun finger print type safe next to your bed, that way gun is still ready and once you train yourself those safes are quick to open,
 

FAS1

Member
A good quality handgun safe bolted down is an option for your home defense handgun. If you don't like electronics then look at the ones that use a pushbutton mechanical lock.



 

Acasper708

New member
Well. I would say getting a pistol that has a internal lock on it would help convince her. As well as a biometric safe.
As for carrying I would say a pistol with multiple safeties. So if one of them did get a hold of it, u may have a few seconds to get it back before they figure it out. Also inside waist band carry.
 

Kennydale

New member
Biometric gun safes and deep conceal holsters, like the 3Speed. (3 Speed Holster)

You won't forget to close this: Gunvault SpeedVault SVB500 gun safe - Amazon.com Keep the extra key somewhere impossible to get at, and the kids can't get in unless they cut your fingers off. You'll notice if they try that.

And wearing a holster that's actually inside your pants will probably deter kids as well. Can't imagine they want to go there.
I use the 3 Speed Holster. Write it from time I awoke till I went to bed. Took her two months to finally ask me what happened to my holster. When I told her it's been on me last two months...she was pissed. She still thinks I'm paranoid for wearing at home.

Sent from my SGH-M919 using Tapatalk
 

tinytank

New member
My wife was the same! I had a long talk about her and addressed all the 'what if's' that she had in her mind. That really helped soothed her racing thoughts.
Afterwards, I also showed her how we can safely store a handgun in a gun safe that works on fingerprint bio-metrics. Can;t say it was easy, but after a few attempts, I successfully convinced her.
 

Ignominious

New member
My wife was the same! I had a long talk about her and addressed all the 'what if's' that she had in her mind. That really helped soothed her racing thoughts.
Afterwards, I also showed her how we can safely store a handgun in a gun safe that works on fingerprint bio-metrics. Can;t say it was easy, but after a few attempts, I successfully convinced her.
Because naturally women are not into violence. Even if the objective of having a gun is protection and self defense. It is still scary with the thought of having one. But, congratulations to you, you were able to convince her.
 

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