Tell Your Neighbors You’re Carrying?

Tell Your Neighbors You’re Carrying?

Tell Your Neighbors You’re Carrying?

Picture this…

Your wife is a social butterfly (you are not) who loves to have people over for dinner and who loves to go to other people’s houses for various social occasions. So one day at church your wife invites a couple over for dinner. They’re not too weird and the dinner is just fine and they invite you over to their house the following weekend.

You like to carry concealed everywhere you go and when you get to this couple’s home you don’t want to leave your gun in the car so what should you do? Well, you have a few options:

Option one, you could just carry concealed into the house and not tell your new friends that you have a gun on you. Or, you could go with option two: You can tell the couple about your firearm and see if they want you to bring a gun in the house.

In the state of Utah where I live, if I tell someone I have a firearm and they don’t want me to bring it into their home then I can’t do it because it’s a private residence and they can decide what they want in their home. I imagine this is the way it is in most states.

I also know that a lot of concealed carry holders find themselves in this position when they go over to someone’s home that they might not know very well yet. Personally, I believe it’s a good idea to ask someone if it’s okay to bring a firearm into their home… In other words, I think it’s important to respect another person’s place.

Just think of the other side of the coin and imagine if someone you didn’t know very well came into your home with a gun, did something stupid, and had an accidental discharge.

I would be angry to say the least, because I want to make sure that everyone who enters my home with a gun (relatives, friends, etc.) knows how to use it and understands proper safety, especially because I have a 16-month-old running around. I’ve never turned down anyone who wanted to enter my home with a gun, but then again, I’ve never had someone who didn’t understand how to properly use a firearm try and come over.

Of course, whether you notify people that you have a gun before entering their home is up to you. And if you’re safe and carrying concealed then they’ll never know you are carrying a firearm. But again, would you want someone to enter your home and not tell you they were armed?

Also, safety purposes aren’t the only reason that I would want someone to tell me they were carrying before they came into my home. If there were a home invasion while they were there I would want to know who had guns and whom I could rely on. I also would not want to accidentally shoot someone pulling out a gun that was actually on my side, but because I didn’t know they were carrying I confused them with a criminal.

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  • Evilties33

    I think there may be a disparity between gaining (or giving) permission to enter private property with a gun and where you reference, as the homeowner, that you would want to know that person understands proper gun safety and how to properly use the gun. In your initial set up, you refer to someone you hardly know, and them visiting your house for the first time. Clearly, visitors gaining permission makes sense. But as the homeowner in that scenario, you cannot ascertain from a brief greeting discussion (say, at the point where you are inviting a person in, and they declare their firearm’s presence to you) whether they know how to properly use a gun, or if they are trained in proper gun safety. How do you determine that? or what is the suggestion to prevent the examples of behavior that would make you “angry, to say the least”? Perhaps inquire whether the visitor would ensure the weapon doesn’t have a round chambered, while visiting?

  • wildad

    Concealed carry means concealed. If I choose to carry I do not tell anyone, including family members. The only reason I would not carry in such a situation is if I thought someone would accidentally find out and cause a scene. I am well trained and will not do anything dumb with my firearm. Asking at someone’s house is like asking at a business, you will almost always get a no.

    • IHateLibs

      ALL of My family Know I do . But A lot of Them carry Too . Or are waiting to . Besides , Some are Cops

      • kiljoy616

        When do Cops want anyone else to carry. Maybe because its family but Cops are the worst when it comes to others having a weapon. Paranoia is the norm not the exception.

  • gro

    Few years back I was visiting a friend of mine (RET USMC COL) and I knew he carried whenever he stepped out of his door and I also carried (we both had/have Carry Permit and legal).
    Anyway he was telling me about a new piece he had purchased and I wasn’t sure he had ‘handled’ the piece I was carrying so, I took mine, unloaded it and handed it to him.
    He went ballistic, wondering why I thought it was necessary to ‘carry’ in his home.
    After he ‘calmed down’ we talked it out and agreed that in the future I would at least announce whether or not I was carrying.
    In a sense, I understand his position, maybe a good ‘solution’ is to sort of ‘check all weapons at the door’.
    I carry out of state (whether ‘legal’ or not) using the logic ‘Whenever you need ‘something’ you don’t have it, so…..’
    Also agree with ‘wildad’ concealed means concealed and I had been in the COL’s home many of times previously and had always carried and in this instance I really thought he knew.

  • Captian Carry

    Not in my state. You do not have to announce you are carrying a fire arm. And I’m sure it’s not like this in most states. But know your local laws.

  • locosway

    Negligent Discharge*

    We need to do away with this accidental stuff.

    • Robert Smith

      Right, also in article mentions “someone you do not know well.. upset. I would be p’oed no matter who let one loose unintentionally.

      • Dave McKenzie

        Same here.

  • James Van Valkenburg

    Depends on the circumstances. Most of my friends KNOW I always carry.
    If I am going to someones house that I am not familiar with, I don’t carry. In conversation i would feel them out about the practice and know before hand the next time i visit them.

  • IHateLibs

    If I cant Carry ?? Then I DONT GO . Simple as that . I don’t care WHO they are

    • Snoopy

      I am with you. A friend will understand. If he does not he is no longer a friend.

  • 2ThinkN_Do2

    Before you show up for the dinner party work the discussion of firearms into a conversation with the people. As a home owner if I were having a party, I would tell people up front if I don’t want guns in my house or I would ask when they arrived if they were carrying. If they said yes, I would probably ask what kind of gun it was, if it was chambered and if it had a safety on. There are places I might consider not being armed and many where I would not agree to be disarmed.

  • juknelis

    I don’t ask my pastor if I can carry in church. I don’t ask the convenience store owner. I don’t ask the hardware store owner. I don’t ask the restaurant owner. If I carry a weapon into a friend’s house, it’s for their protection as well as my family’s and mine. Why make it a big deal? The only permission I really need is from the State in which I live. However, if an acquaintance asks me not to carry in their home, I feel I must respect that, but only if they know I’m carrying.

    • coachpan

      Excellent points ! I agree.

    • MD H

      Church, the convenience store, the hardware store and the restaurant are all public places. My

      • Birdog

        All the places you mentioned are private property.

      • Anthony Connolly

        It does not matter if it is a public place or a private residence, we have a RIGHT to our own self defense. Will the owner of the private residence guarantee my safety while I am there? Perhaps private residences should require guests to wear straight jackets and leg irons as hands and feet are deadly weapons as well. Anyone that would deny my right to self defense is no friend of mine and someone that I don’t need to know.

        • MSG L

          Private means just that. You do not have any right to force yourself or your ideas on anyone. Come to my house and get dumba$$ and you will not be met with approval.

  • Dave McKenzie

    Unless it’s a close friend and I know they too carry, I just lock my gun in a safe in my vehicle. Otherwise, I won’t carry into someone’s home. To me it’s a matter of courtesy and respect for my host/hostess. Even if they’re close friends, they probably don’t know I carry and I simply don’t want to put myself in a situation that could ruin a friendship.

  • Andrew

    Concealed is concealed. Period.

  • msg51

    If you are going to ask permission or tell some one you are carrying, what is the point of carrying concealed. If you are going to announce you are carrying you might as well open carry.

  • OC for Tactical Advantage

    I open carry and completely avoid these ridiculous situations.

  • SCfromNY

    In SC you must have the homeowners permission. Besides that I am very secure with my firearm safety and a few close friends I shoot with others not so much. So for all those, “It’s my gun, it’s concealed, and I’ll do what I want. . . ” Wrong! It’s my house, I make the rules, and my rules are in effect as you step over the threshold. Don’t like it? Don’t come in.

    • 2ThinkN_Do2

      And how would someone know that this is against the law unless they know the laws in all the states? There are waaaaaay too many laws and most likely, We Are All breaking some unknown law everyday. So, maybe you should post those No Gun signs on your front door, like businesses can have. I love those gun shops that say no loaded guns allowed : (

      • bkfred

        If one is carrying a handgun it is that person’s responsibility to know the laws of the state in this regard. I have gone through the course in Minnesota twice (once for renewal) and SC once and this was one of the primary points of the lessons. I expect it is so elsewhere as well. So far the gun restriction advocates have had little to base objections to the liberalization of carry laws because those who are legal follow the rules.

  • coachpan

    OK what is the answer? Pros and cons . How about your second amendment rights?

  • AmericanIcon

    I would just as soon leave my trousers in the car as I would my pistol. Anyone who knows me knows I never leave my house unarmed, and that I train, as well as practice, regularly – and that the only negligent discharges are those caused by handling the firearm: The less it’s handled, the lower the possibility. If someone is ‘uncomfortable’ with me carrying in his home, I’m just as uncomfortable being there.

  • Douglas Moore

    I respect private property rights. If they don’t want my gun, they don’t want me either. But, if I know they don’t want a gun carried in their house, I’m not going to wear it concealed and sneak it in. Flip side is that I want people to respect my property rights too.

  • cambeul41

    This not something I worry about. My wife and I socialize very little. The only neighbors whose houses we have been in are the ones who served as references when we got our CCW/CPLs – and our renewals.

    Of course we would obey the law, but we don’t discuss our underwear with just anyone, and our guns are under the outer wear. We don’t make a secret about carrying. If we were to suspect that our carrying might be found objectionable, we would either ask or not carry, but otherwise carrying is the default. We feel no need to blab about carrying or justify not disarming. It is up to the homeowner to clarify his/her rules, not up to me to ask whether my pocket contents meet with approval.

    A few weeks ago, we had our furnace serviced. The technician was introduced to our dog, Browning Hi Power known as Brownie. He comment that his previous appointment was with a family which had a dog named Ruger, “which is what I carry.” It did not ocur to me to question why he was carrying in my house or to object to his doing so.

  • ingmarmxy321

    my Aunty Grace got a
    nearly new blue Kia by working part time from the internet. look at this now
    B­i­g­2­9­.­ℂ­o­m

  • MSG L

    I am an open carrier so I do not have the heartache of whether to “tell” or not. I wear my weapon, well holstered, out in the open for all the honest world to see. In the past five years I have had only two minor incidents involving people who objected to my weapon. People just do not get that excited about it here in Washington State.
    And there is no such animal as an accidental discharge, Loco is correct, it is always negligent.

  • tionico

    If I can’t trust someone WITH a gun, how can I trist him without? Same way backwards.. if someone is unwilling to trust ME wiht my gun in their home/car/place of business, why would I think they’d trust me without? And if not, why even BE there?

    I just carry wherever I go. There are only two ways anyone will find out if I’m armed: first, if LE and they have a legitimate/laawful right to be asking me. Second, if I’m there and something happens and I eitiher draw and engage the threat, or don’t and play the victim along with everyone lese who is there. And for folks in MY home, if they are squirrely enough I’d not want them armed inside, then I’ll not want them unarmed inisde, either. Intent is intent. The took put into service to realise the intent is immaterial.

    And as to “respecting” other people’s homes, I figure the best way of doing that is to come armed and prepare to defend them against harm, should any befall. Pretty simple, really.

  • Remedy

    Leave the gun home or in the car, use your head, common sense dicates always.

  • Remedy

    As a police office we have to carry off duty (departmental rule) and are under no obligation to
    announce this.
    However, I don’t want anyone carrying a weapon in my home unless they are a police officer
    no exceptions.
    I also believe this question is getting a little carried away

  • cwcomm

    I would suggest a third option: Open up discussion about personal protection, conceal carry, etc. before visiting their house. This could easily be done during their visit to your house or invite them out for coffee/breakfast/brunch to discuss it in a neutral territory. Another quick way to find out their stance on guns would be to invite them to go to a gun range to shoot for fun.

  • Bob

    It’s not uncommon at a dinner invitation to be offered a beer or glass of wine. For those who advocate sneaking your firearm in, would you have a drink to avoid offending the host? Or would you prefer to come across as stiff?

  • G50AE

    This article reminds me of one of the forum discussions entitled, “Do you inform the front desk person when checking into a hotel, that you are carrying?” There were a lot of interesting discussion points made in the thread.
    It makes sense that if you are going to inform your next door neighbor that you are carrying, that you would inform the front desk person at a hotel and the driver when using the services of a taxi or limo.

  • James Parks

    In South Carolina, you MUST ask permission before entering another’s home while carrying:

    SECTION 23-31-225. Carrying concealed weapons into residences or dwellings.

    No person who holds a permit issued pursuant to Article 4, Chapter 31, Title 23 may carry a concealable weapon into the residence or dwelling place of another person without the express permission of the owner or person in legal control or possession, as appropriate. A person who violates this provision is guilty of a misdemeanor and, upon conviction, must be fined not less than one thousand dollars or imprisoned for not more than one year, or both, at the discretion of the court and have his permit revoked for five years.

  • Pongo

    I went to the house of a “friend of a friend” to play cards one night. I had been there several times before. This night, it became warm inside and I removed my jacket. My CCW was under my shirt, but I inadvertently exposed it, getting up to grab a soda or something. The owner of the home FLIPPED OUT. He was incredulous that I had DARED bring a gun into his home. I thought nothing of it, being an always carrier, and hadn’t thought about asking. I immediately took my revolver and locked it in my truck to diffuse the situation. After that hand, I and my friend left. I have not been there again. Lesson learned. If you’re not sure, keep it CONCEALED. AND a man’s home is his castle. He’s the king. Remember that.

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