Texas Campus Carry News: Lawsuits and Sex Toys

Remember those University of Texas professors and their throw-everything-at-the-wall-to-see-what-sticks lawsuit in an effort to block Texas campus carry?

Well, turns out, nothing stuck.

A federal judge denied their request for a preliminary injunction Monday. Classes started Wednesday, as did the first day of campus carry. Needless to say, no gunfights erupted in the hallways.  Unfortunately the lawsuit still lives, but the judge said the three professors “failed to establish a substantial likelihood of ultimate success on the merits of their asserted claims.”

“It appears to the court that neither the Texas Legislature nor the Board of Regents has overstepped its legitimate power to determine where a licensed individual may carry a concealed handgun in an academic setting,” Judge Lee Yeakel wrote in his opinion.

He expressed doubts in the arguments of the professors, who claim that their First Amendment, Second Amendment, and Fourteenth Amendment rights are being infringed with the new law.

“Their First Amendment claim is and must be bottomed on their right to speak and teach freely,” the judge wrote. “Neither the campus carry law nor the campus carry policy forbids them from doing so.”

But don’t expect the professors to be deterred. Their attorney Renea Hicks said that while they were “obviously disappointed,” they would “begin to pull together the evidence and facts for the trial and hope things go smoothly on campus in the meantime.”

Yeah, about what’s happening on campus…here’s where things get really strange.

On Tuesday over 4,500 dildos were handed out to UT students, alumni, and other protesters by Cocks Not Glocks, a protest group founded last fall in retaliation to the new law.

“As long as you have a dick on your backpack, people will be thinking about the guns inside of other people backpacks” said group founder and alumna Jessica Jin.

The dildo became the symbol of anti-gun rhetoric on campus because of UT’s obscenity policy, which states: “no person or organization will distribute or display on the campus any writing or visual image, or engage in any public performance, that is obscene … as defined in Texas Penal Code, Section 43.21 or successor provisions.”

The school is looking at the distribution and display of the dildos as protected free speech, however.

“UT Austin students are free to express themselves peacefully on all issues,” university spokesman J.B. Bird said. “The planned protests around campus carry appear to be examples of protected political speech. We ask that the conversations around this issue remain civil. We encourage students of all opinions to be a part of this and other discussions of public policy.”

You see, UT Austin respects the rights of their students.

These protesters are happy to take full advantage of the First Amendment while yelling that no one should respect the rights afforded by the Second Amendment. Trust me; the irony is completely lost on them.

What exactly does a college education gets you these days? (And shouldn’t alumni have better things to do than strap dildos to their bags?)

The group Students for Concealed Carry issued a statement Wednesday morning embracing the dildo movement, with Brian Bensimon, SCC director for the state of Texas, saying “If carrying a phallus to class helps you express yourself, go for it. We welcome this demonstration that freedom of speech and concealed carry of handguns can coexist on the same campus.”

The group did issue a warning to the protesters, however.

“SCC does recommend, however, that students use their dildos for political or recreational purposes only. Using a dildo as a defensive weapon could classify it as a ‘club,’ which, under Texas law, is illegal to carry in public and constitutes a felony if carried into a building on campus….Although SCC’s opinion shouldn’t be taken as legal advice, we feel that Texas students are on pretty solid legal ground as long as they use their dildos only as expressions of free speech or for the manufacturer’s’ intended purpose.”

God Bless America.