BREAKING: White House Declares Stimulus Checks Cannot Be Used to Buy Firearms or Ammo

White House Declares Stimulus Checks Cannot Be Used to Buy Firearms or Ammo

After much back and forth between parties, last Friday, President Donal Trump signed into law the $2 trillion stimulus package. If eligible, you will get $1,200 per adult and $500 for every child.

Hopefully, you will put this money to use on things you need like food and toilet paper. But we all know that some people will spend this money on non-essential items. And apparently, the White House knows this as well.

This morning, a White House representative addressed the issue and stated that stimulus checks must be used on essential items only. He went on to state what some of the non-essential items are.

“Many of you are asking what we consider non-essential items. A complete list will be posted on the White House website before the checks are issued. But things like firearms, ammunition, tobacco products and alcohol are on the list of non-essential items.”

Your next question is probably, “How would they know what you spend it on?”

The details aren’t clear yet, but they stated that the stimulus checks would be deposited into a special bank account, which would allow them to monitor purchases and possibly decline charges for non-essential items.

Now, I’m sure someone will figure out a workaround so that you can buy that shiny new pistol you’ve had your eye on, especially since this is an April Fools Joke.